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After a few days in his new home, the bird began to speak. “Polly want a cracker”, etcetera, you know, the usual stuff.Time passed, and the bird b...gan to swear. And swear, and swear. The new owner, a firefighter, was no stranger to Anglo Saxon turns of phrase, but, Lawsey! This bird knew some curses!The firefighter tried reasoning with the bird, and, for his trouble, was invited to have carnal knowledge of a goat.He tried yelling at the bird, and was invited to worship at the altar of the. "What was that wonderful salad dressing?" she asked."Just something I whipped up. Actually, I've been trying to perfect the recipe for a long time. I think it's getting close." Close, hell. If it were any better, it would be illegal."Sam had a way of making me laugh. After we had eaten, Sam moved her clothes from the washer to the dryer and came back in the living room. She had brushed her hair back and I wondered how I had ever thought she was a boy."How old are you, Sam?" I'm sixteen. I'll be. More

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